Why Germany Should Venerate the United Kingdom

As a middle-aged, notionally British man of no fixed emotional abode, who considers himself a world citizen, but who has been often described as more German than the Germans, I have no particular axe to grind when comparing cultures. This is a very delicate thing to do, since even by suggesting a cultural difference will often elicit a negative response, suggesting that the person making the observation is implying criticism of the other’s culture. That said, my British childhood has inculcated in me a strong sense of justice, fair play and ‘play up, play up and play the game.’

Britain is often viewed by Germans as almost a Third World country; a sort of cold, grey Portugal; an 18^th C theme park with 17^th C ideas and 16^th C plumbing and completely fixated by the Second World War (pronounced the ‘woowah’).  I remember once during a class discussion on different historical perspectives, I mentioned that less than a century ago Britain was the richest, most powerful country on the planet. This statement elicited risible incredulity from my German students. My German wife, as a teenager, thought that the Beatles, Stones, Floyd and all the big names of popular culture hailed from the USA. These are but two examples of how Britain is viewed by many Germans.

In my opinion the woowah was really only part II of a global conflagration, whose causes had to do with European national hubris and competition. The scale of the conflagration was unprecedented. This was total war were all the means of production were devoted to the slaughter. Depending on how you measure it and who you ask, Britain was overtaken as the richest country on the planet by the USA and Germany at about the time of the outbreak of war in August 1914, so a cynical view is that Britain had to go to war with Germany at that time to maintain its supremacy, since, to do so later would have meant to lose that supremacy.

The British Empire rapidly ran out of money and had to go cap in hand to the USA for loans to continue the conflict. Naturally, the USA as a player and serious contender, was only to pleased to have this leverage over one of its two major competitors to tear chunks out of its other competitor. Some of this loan will never be paid off, incidentally. So, The USA had one of its competitors try to destroy its other competitor, with USA material paid for by massive loans in perpetuity. Nice work, if you can get it.

When the two main players had battered each other to a standstill by 1917, the USA joins in to tip the balance, although some say the balance at the time was already tipping towards Britain and her allies and that had the USA delayed any further, it would have been too late to have any say in the peace treaty. After all, to the victor, the spoils. When Woodrow Wilson came to Paris for the peace conference he was lauded as the saviour of Europe, curiously, given the above. He was the leader of a country that stood by while Europe was destroyed, provided one of the adversaries the means to effect that destruction and landed that adversary with an intolerable debt. A large proportion of this debt was given to other combatants to keep them fighting. Wilson was also responsible for abdicating a primary function of government to private interests by signing the Federal Reserve Act. This is such a miserably cynical piece of power politics that ever was and has caused such problems for the world.

So here, Britain, a democracy, sacrificed her world position to prevent non-democracies from establishing their primacy. Thank you very much Britain, I hear you say, how can we ever repay you?

The Treaty of Versailles, however, reflected who the real victors were; Britain and France. Cynics might say that the non-participation of the USA in the League of Nations was as a result of not getting more of the spoils of war. It was the spoils of war that contained the seeds of German discontent that brought the Nazis to power. It is common to suggest that it was Clemenceau who dug his heals in when it was clear that the pain of war reparations and that the Brits were the moderators in these discussions, but I cannot imagine that Ramsey MacDonald, nice chap that he was notwithstanding, could give up the opportunity to get some of the money the war had cost.

Furthermore, the financial crises of the 20s and 30s were American in origin and it has been suggested that they were contrived by the very men behind the setting up of the Federal Reserve. Whether this is true or not, they certainly did very well from the crises.

Britain has given the world John Maynard Keynes. Again, I hear you say, thank you very much, Britain. It was Keynesian economics that pulled the USA out of its economic difficulties in FDR’s New Deal in the 30s. It was Keynesian economics that was behind the Marshall Plan to rebuild Europe. Britain benefitted very little from this plan, but instead contributed hugely to the rebuilding of Europe. Very little of this has entered the consciousness of Germans. Cynics might say that the setting up of Britain’s Welfare State and having a very left wing government might have prevented Britains access to these funds. In Germany, the Marshall Plan funds are still in existence are administered by the Investitionsbank, which is very helpful for the German economy.

The various conferences to design the post- woowah world obliged Britain to help police that world with a military and administration vastly disproportionate to its population or GDP and paid for with further loans. Britain, therefore was further impoverished – no spoils for this victor, but unsupportable burdens.

Britain, therefore had no opportunity to modernise its industry, which is vitally important to this argument. Any business that is under-funded will fail. Similarly, any country that is under-funded will fail. Every post- woowah government has tried to square this circle; grasping at one risible straw after another from the water driven economic predictor machine that still exists in the basement of the LSE to the Thatcher Monetarist revolution that gave away, through ideological fundamentalism, the great opportunity provided by North Sea Oil (by contrast, see what Norway has done with its share of the bounty – highest GDP per capita in 2006).

None of this detracts very much that in essence Britain sacrificed herself to prevent genuinely evil empires from establishing themselves and paid and continues to pay the cost. I’ll tell you what Germany, treat all that we have done for you as an investment and we’ll take our dividends at a reasonable rate.

Lastly, Germany, don’t get offended by our apparent fixation with woowah, it was, and remains our finest hour as Churchill predicted. John 15:13 Greater love hath no man, that he lays down his life for his friends – is not entirely correct – Britain did this for humanity; friends and foes alike.